Whatever Lola Wants, Lola Gets…except in Waikiki

Waikiki, Hawaiii….after counting down the date for months, spring break finally arrived.

Yes we ( my daughter, her two girlfriends and me) scored a wonderfully large suite on the 25th floor which featured an amazing view, but there was one significant problem: there were only two beds in the girls’ room. I knew this would be the case (unlike some people, I do my homework ahead of time – see Sometimes Mommy really Does Know Best).  I`d hoped the girls would be able to sort out sleeping arrangements themselves, but clearly that was wishful thinking! The Princess immediately claimed one bed for herself and was totally oblivious to my daughter’s suggestion they each take turns sleeping on the couch; it was evident the Princess was going nowhere and the plebeians could solve the problem without her.

So what did I do?  I did what any great mediator would do – I paid to have a cot placed in between the two beds, so that all three girls would be together and on more or less common ground. Then, I chose the larger bedroom with the king size bed and ensuite leaving their domain as the second bedroom, second bathroom, living room and kitchen – they weren`t exactly hard done by. I figured that I would require my own personal haven away from the girls – and I was right!

Whooo – another crisis averted.

Once bags were dumped and clothes changed,we ventured out in search of groceries. I was delighted to find that right across the street was an ABC foodmart. (Of course I learned later there are 39 ABC stores on the island ) The Princess dillied and dallied over her choices (she picked this opportunity to buy leis and hair clips and shampoo and candy and...), thus turning a 15 minute grocery trip into an hour long major shopping extravaganza.  Good thing neither my husband, the Original Obnoxious One, or son, the Obnoxious One was with us or there would have been blood on the floor. I figured I was going to have to fortify myself, so stocked up on wine and Skinny Girl Margaritas.

The Princess decreed that the purpose of the trip was to:

  1. acquire a better tan than anyone else at school
  2. purchase an entirely new wardrobe
  3. spend more on her boyfriend than the others did

Consequently the Princess  decided the girls must wake up early every morning in order to maximize tanning time during peak sun hours; she set her alarm for 8 am. Four hours on the  beach were to be followed by four hours of shopping. I kept my distance and did my own thing during the day depending on my mood – walking the beach, sightseeing, hop on hop off trolley routes, swimming in both the pool and ocean.

All went relatively smoothly until the third day (not counting my daughter`s mounting frustration with her friend`s high-handedness), when we woke up to a windy, cloudy day.Nevertheless we tried to spend some time of the beach, but after an hour or so we all gave up; the girls headed straight for the Ala Moana Shopping centre while I ventured out to do some sightseeing. We agreed to meet up at 7pm at an Italian restaurants.

As it turned out, only the Princess and I had cell phones – the Sweetie Pie had not brought hers (due to the high cost of roaming fees) and the Weird One‘s phone didn’t work.So guess what happened – yep, the girls split up because the Princess wanted to do some heavy duty shopping for her boyfriend all by herself. The girls agreed to meet at a certain location in 20 minutes. The Sweetie Pie and the Weird One showed up and waited…

and waited…

and waited for over 30 minutes.

They went in search of the Princess, but found me instead. We all tried phoning and texting the Princess, but no answer…until 20 minutes later when the Sweetie Pie and Weird One were long gone.

We did all meet up for dinner a couple hours later, which proved to be a bit of a disaster – the food was much more expensive than our concierge had promised, the Princess treated us to the silent treatment making it clear that her royal feelings were hurt, and our waitress gave our bill and my credit card to another table. Arggggh! Waitressing helped put me though university many years ago, so I do understand what it takes to be a good waitress as opposed to a lousy one…and we had a LOUSY one. That night back at the hotel, the Princess kept her nose sky-high and refused to converse with us.

The next day I sent a brief message to the parents informing them that we`d had a bit of an issue at the mall and the girls became separated. Since I was the one in charge I had to do my best to prevent the white slavers, drug lords and crime bandits from getting their hands on our precious daughters, but the Princess was not helping matters! The Princess’ mom asked me if the Princess had innocently wandered away or absent-mindedly not paid attention to the time; I had to take a deep breath. I wanted to scream that her idiot daughter purposely took off but instead focused on the facts. The mom was concerned and wanted to call her daughter that night and read her the riot act. Great — I could just picture the reaction.The Princess’ pouting would be magnified by a hundred and we would ALL have a miserable vacation.

I assured the mom that we were handling the situation, and she just needed to be aware. The mom then insisted that her daughter, the Princess apologize to the rest of us.Great in theory but there was no way in hell the Princess was going to apologize to anyone ever! In fact, she expected all of us to apologize to her for not waiting around forever for her. What was her mom smoking???

The next morning I asked the girls to pick me up a latte downstairs. Yes daily lattes are my only vice…well one of my few vices..okay, so I can NOT start the day without a nonfat latte or 3…

Anyways, I figured that since I made it possible for these girls to spend a week in Hawaii the least they could do was buy me a latte in the morning. Apparently that was WAY too much to expect. After 40 minutes of waiting in the room, I gave up and went downstairs to get my own – luckily I ran into them in the elevator. They had gone shopping for lemons so took longer than expected – even though we had lemons in the room!

So once again I kept my distance for the rest of the day…and did my own pouting…and venting…and swearing…and


But that`s not all…stay tuned.

2 thoughts on “Whatever Lola Wants, Lola Gets…except in Waikiki

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