Mamas, Don’t Let Your Babies Grow up to be Princesses!

That goes for you too Daddies – because you don’t want folks like me taking your little darlings on vacation. Oh, they might survive for a little while, but sooner or later…

Who am I trying to kid? I like to talk tough on this blog. I figuratively pull my hair out a lot. But I haven’t murdered anyone yet…not quite.

And I know, when your little princess is born, she IS beautiful. She is the most precious being in the whole entire world… and that’s totally normal and natural for the first 6 months
 or 2 years
or even 4 years. But please people – reality needs to hit sometime before 16 years of age!!! Tough love can be a wonderful thing. Otherwise some poor sucker soul like me and my darling Demon Child Weird One will be forced to deal with:

  • rearranging our sleep schedules, and eating habits to suit your Princess. Yeah, I love to get up early on vacation.
  • waiting forever for the Princess to help out and waiting for never for apologies. Who cares since we’re all perfect, right?
  • measuring the circumference of each girl’s thigh, so the Princess can gloat that she has the smallest.  Actually MINE is smaller, but whatever?!
  • listening to her brag about how much money and how many cool things she bought for her boyfriend (more than $150 worth and at least 5 items including boxers)   So I bought coffee that cost $17 for my darling husband, and a $25 dollar Tshirt for my son that says: Come to the dark side…we have cookies.
  • overhearing her loud whisperings to the boyfriend on the cell phone for at least 60 minutes every night . Conversations that consist of constant reassurances such as “I’m not as pretty as the other girls” followed by “no you’re the prettiest” and  “the other girls have smaller waists than I do” to which the response was “no I’m sure yours is the smallest”…and on and on. This kind of stuff really makes me want to barf!
  • the silent treatment if the conversation does not revolve around the Princess at all times – or better yet, cell phone activity such as texting, facebook chatting or game playing while you’re attempting to carry on a conversation with her. Just ’cause so many folks do this doesn’t make it right!
  • hearing how even though she is failing all of her high school classes (since she doesn’t go to class or hand in assignments), she is still going to one of the best schools in the world when she finishes grade 12. Yeah, go figure.

You get the drift. I could go on and on…oops I already have!

So the one positive outcome ? I have now decided that my daughter’s behaviour is not quite so bad, at least not 100% of the time, and that I really can start calling her the Weird One. Sometimes. Just don’t tell anyone.

And my daughter even admitted that the Princess drove her “way more crazy” than I usually do. In fact, you’re probably asking, as I did, why my daughter is friends with this delightful creature…let’s just say that sometimes it takes time spent together in close quarters for true colours to appear. So this week it was two steps forward.

My darling daughter in her Morphsuit

The Weird One even sat down and read all of my recent blog postings while I quivered and quaked in the background. Her only comment?

“Mom, how come you make yourself sound SO perfect.”

“Darling, I’m the writer of MY blog. That’s my prerogative” 🙂


P.S. My apologies to Tales from the Motherland and She Can’t Be Serious — these amazing ladies have tagged me on blogging awards but I have not responded yet. I promise that I will acknowledge them in my next post. In the meantime, I just HAD to vent to y’all and get this stuff off my chest!!!


5 thoughts on “Mamas, Don’t Let Your Babies Grow up to be Princesses!

  1. I can only guess that perhaps you and your daughter are not exactly on friendly terms with Princess and her family now? This sounds pretty unpleasant! Next time, maybe leave the friends at home, it sounds like.

    The morph suit, however is amazing! I want one of those! 🙂

      • That is unfortunate. Never good when things end like that, and really a bummer to have that dynamic on any vacation! Sorry for you all, that it turned out like that, though it’s a nice thing that your daughter has been elevated to simply Weird. 🙂

        Thanks for the link! I may look this up, though I’m certain I would not look quite as good in it! It could come in handy for one of our Oscar parties. 🙂

  2. How old is this girl – 16? That’s definitely old enough to have manners, especially when someone TAKES YOU TO HAWAII! (forgive the all caps). No pressure on the tagging thing. But I did think you were perfect, haha.

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